Just like physical health, mental health, spiritual health is thought of as a much needed human function/area of well-being need, so is sexual health. It is time that the term ‘sexual health’ was not purely linked to GUM clinics/STDs etc. “Sexual health is a state of physical, emotional, mental and social well-being related to sexuality; it is not merely the … Read More
Avoiding Burnout
Burnout. I can’t use my own hands to count how many times people have recently said that they think I am burning the candle on both ends. I need to borrow some extra hands.In part, they are right. After 7 years of living with chronic fatigue, the spoon theory was such a helpful read. It helped me make sense of … Read More
Name claim!
Most people on here know me only by my nickname Jay. I’ve gone by this for 14 years, but over time, with more and more lads being nicknamed/called Jay too – I’m done! So I’ve gone to the end of my birth name, instead of the beginning. I was christened Jolene, and I’ve never liked it (much to my mum’s … Read More
Hypnotherapy for sexual health
This topic has been very much on my mind for many years, but I have always been afraid to write it down in case it got my website labelled as ‘questionable’ and get it blocked! The time is right to stand my ground and share what should not be a taboo topic. Having worked with people with challenges such as … Read More
Workplace Wellness
Do you have a Workplace Reproductive & Emotional Health Policy in place? Staff wellbeing, good emotional and mental health is crucial to the everyday running of a business. When it comes to Reproductive and Emotional Health, the subject is usually rather taboo and private, but it affects so many people. Although Human Resources professionals are well equipped to tackle most … Read More
Birth Trauma revisited 7 years on (surrogacy pregnancy)
Today is my 1st surrogate babies 7th birthday. This post comes with a big trigger warning of a traumatic birth/postpartum story. It was a day of such mixed feelings. On one hand, it was THE BEST DAY! The day my friends finally got to hold their baby in their arms. It was amazing, and I’ve enjoyed being part of their … Read More
Supporting newborn sleep and University drop off
Supporting newborn sleep and University drop off… what do these two things have in common? Yesterday I dropped my firstborn baby off at her uni accommodation, all while remotely supporting families with newborns, with their emotions and practicalities of adjusting to life with a new baby. For those that don’t know, I recently added Sleep Coaching to my supportive services, … Read More
Birth & Postpartum During a Pandemic – 3 Step Rewind
Birth & Postpartum During a Pandemic. When lockdown first began, I thought that I may find some extra time. I made plans to do a twice-weekly Zoom meditation for the pregnant women that I support, and do some writing and creative stuff. Maybe get my garden tidied up. Then it began. The worries, concerns, fear, anxiety, the trauma from families … Read More
What will happen if I have to birth alone?
One of the most common birthing concerns right now is: What will happen if I have to birth alone? Hopefully, all women will be able to have their partner with them during their birth, but if it is a worry of yours, then my suggestion is to work out a Plan B, for just in case. Let’s plan for the … Read More
Early labour doula support (via call or video)
Dear families, I’m adding this extra page temporarily to open up my support during these challenging times. Many parents hoping for various types of birth are being told to stay at home as long as possible before going into hospital, whilst I normally appreciate this advice for those planning a hospital birth, this is when it is mamas instinctive choice, … Read More
You guessed it… Only online birth & postnatal support only for a while.
It won’t come as a surprise, and isn’t actually out of the ordinary for me to do my birth & postnatal support online, as most of my clients are international and we work via all manner of methods – Zoom, Google Hangouts, WhatsApp video & Skype. Whichever works best for you. So until the world shifts and changes a little, … Read More
Birth Plans: going with the flow…
Going with the flow! …but whose flow is it? I want to shout out for you to be more assertive, and decide how you prefer to be looked after whilst YOU are birthing. Over the last decade I have seen repeat patterns. Most of the women that I see at sessions that involve any kind of planning are usually second … Read More
Looking after your relationship after birth
Relationship Support after Baby Not all relationships can be saved or are even worth saving, BUT then there are those that really are worth working for; those that just get broken-down due to stress, exhaustion, big new emotions following your individual birth experiences. There is a gorgeous new baby that draws all of the loving attention in (rightfully so!) but … Read More
Availability update!
Hello lovely people, a quick update about availability going forward. I’m taking on a new online role with an international company, and this is going to hugely narrow down the hours I have available for my private practice. As soon as I begin (next week is when training commences), I’ll be able to better see how to amend my diary … Read More
Pill, pill, bloody pill
Are there any other areas in the medical world where one type of medication is given for so many health problems? Heavy painful periods? Here, have the birth control pill. Endometriosis? Here have the birth control pill. Fibroids or cysts? Here have the birth control pill. Acne? Here, have the birth control pill. Feeling ‘hormonal’? Here, have the birth control … Read More
New booking system!
You asked, I listened and actioned! We have a new appointment booking system. Online of course. Now you can book your appointments, whilst seeing all potential times available for the type of appointment you would like, and at any hour of the day, and easy card payments. I am yet to embed the link on to the website, so I … Read More
Undisturbed Birth
Undisturbed Birth? Yes please! Birth plan following a Sarah J. Buckley, MD study day, Edinburgh 2013. After attending Sarah Buckley’s study day on undisturbed birth I was asked to write a report for it. A way of sharing with others what I had got from the day. Now, I’ve pondered over this for a couple of weeks and have decided … Read More
Use of Sound in Pregnancy
Article featured in Mother & Baby magazine 2013 – Use of Sound in Pregnancy. Jay Kelly is a Hypnotherapist and Mind-Body Medicine Practitioner, mum of four and soon to be surrogate mum. Here she talks about how she uses affirmations and positive words as part of her therapy and tells her own personal experience of the power of music. “Affirmations … Read More
Emotional Bank Account
How many of us are overdrawn, emotionally, physically, mentally? This is a technique that I first started using when I joined the Fertile Body Method training about 6 years ago! And something I have used since. It’s really quite simple, and for those who are very left brained you can make this super list worthy if you like! Even if … Read More
End Period Poverty
End Period Poverty. The #endperiodpoverty is very much in the news at present. It is about time. So many people do not even know it is a thing. I didn’t until last year. I didn’t grow up with money, and after 11 years as a lone parent to 4 daughters, this is currently still the case, but sanitary products have … Read More
Mind-Body Fertility course – to help with conception
Mind-Body Fertility 3 month course Mind-Body Fertility course – to help with conception. 5 sessions as a group, spread over 3 months. Includes an individual consultation and Mizan (fertility massage) appointment. Numbers limited to 8 people per series of workshops. Location: Women’s Alchemy, Luna Treatment Rooms, Harrogate, North Yorkshire, HG1 5BJ. Give yourself every chance of natural conception. … Read More
What to expect at your first Mizan appointment
What to expect at your first Mizan appointment? Here is a little guide as to what you may experience at your first session with a Mizan Practitioner. Most first appointments take upwards of 2 hours usually, occasionally 3 hours. You may have already filled in your client intake/information form, and will go through it with your practitioner, or you may … Read More
What is Mizan?
What is Mizan therapy? I’ve been asked this so many times, and I never tire of talking about it, about wombs, about women’s bodies. Mizan (sounds like Milan) is essentially an abdominal massage. Focusing on the lower abdomen, the upper abdomen and the lower back. The massage helps to bring a fresh, oxygenated blood supply to the reproductive organs and … Read More
5 things to look for in a Fertility Therapist
5 things to look for in a fertility therapist. My top tips for finding the right Fertility Specialist for you are primarily coming from a Mind-Body perspective on Fertility. My specialist area covers Hypnotherapy, NLP, EFT in particular, and since I’m a passionate ‘NON-Jack of All Trades’ advocate, but I have a big passion for the fact that different methods … Read More
Save the midwife
#savethemidwife campaign. Disappointed that we need it… but so lovely seeing all of the wonderful pregnancy and birth pictures supporting it. To very briefly explain my personal story for the backing of it, here are the two pictures I’ve posted so far, and the words that I shared on my Facebook page. “Having one to one care with an Independent … Read More
Loving Kindness Meditation
Loving Kindness Meditation How I’ve only just come across the Metta Loving Kindness Meditation I have no idea! I will share a written version here and add a recorded version to the MP3 section for those who prefer a Guided Meditation. With my usual aim of keeping somethings in life simple and sustainable, I am keeping it a straightforward block … Read More
Really simple mindfulness breathing technique
Square Breathing. Really simple breathing technique to calm the mind and body down. You can make your count of 4 as long or as quick as you need to. I chose the number four because it keeps it simple. If you have a really busy mind, look around you for something with square lines (tv, picture frame, window, shed etc) … Read More
Surrogacy. A gift worth celebrating.
3 years ago my life was totally engulfed in surrogacy. I was midway through a labour that resulted in my friends meeting their baby for the first time. Once the baby was born I wanted the world to know that “this is a thing”, a thing people can do. That I had just experienced a life-changing year, and I was … Read More
Mother Earth. Father Sun. Moon…?
Mother Earth, Father Sun, Moon what? First of all, some may wonder who am I to be telling you ‘how it is’. I’m not. I’m sharing how I feel it is. How ‘I’ see it. How another sees it is their well earned point of view. Second thing I’d like to clear up is that I do not worship anything. … Read More
Different routes to becoming a mum
There are many different routes to becoming a mum. Today has been a breath of fresh air, and a deep debrief, all at the at the same time. It’s been such a busy few weeks and I’ve barely had time to stop and think, or do anything but work-home-parent. Today I had to fit in yet another thing, but this time … Read More
Pregnancy after loss
Hope this little testimonial gives you hope. Pregnancy after loss “I am grateful every day that life events caused my path to cross with Jay’s. I first met her when was I was going through a particularly difficult and challenging time having lost two much wanted babies in the space of 6 months. I can say with confidence that the … Read More
‘Think yourself fertile’ versus ‘TTC’
Think yourself fertile Vs TTC – the power of mind-body medicine Are the three little letters TTC all consuming? Whether you are hoping to conceive naturally, or are having assisted conception, Hypnosis and Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) can really help support you. For someone who is going through the stresses of IVF, Hypnotherapy can be the saving grace when it … Read More
I used to be a Birth Doula…
Almost a year ago I wrote a blog on “Why I used to be a doula”, as I was struggling with being bartered down, and the role devalued. The blog still stands, but being a Doula, I just can’t help myself when asked again if I’ll support a woman. I said “I used to be a Birth Doula. It was … Read More
What is ‘hypnobirthing’ and will it help?
What is ‘hypnobirthing’ and will it help? Hypnobirthing has become a massive business in the last few years. I love the positive birth focus, but I don’t much like the hypnobirthing hype. No technique should take credit for a woman’s birthing ability. No one should go into birth believing that they need to do this particular technique in this particular … Read More
Guided meditation for Fear releasing
Guided meditation for Fear Releasing. For some women, pregnancy brings excitement and giddy anticipation. For others, it can bring fear, anxieties, vulnerabilities… and endless “what if’s”. Before I go any further and paint a picture of pregnancy being doom and gloom, I want to tell you what I think pregnancy should feel like: Special, precious, invigorating, wondrous, amazing, exciting, blossoming … Read More
2 week wait & 1st trimester exhaustion
The 2ww – Mindful ways to help Implantation So once the miracle of conception has happened, whether through natural methods or assisted, the next physiological stage is implantation. Sticky vibes from well meaning friends is one thing, but what can you do to possibly help yourself during the 2 week wait? In no particular order, here are some bite-size ideas. … Read More
How sperm works
This subject is an entire breezeblock of book, not just a few paragraphs, but I thought a brief overview is worthwhile. So we know that we need millions of sperm, all strong swimmers, with stamina and all swimming in the correct direction. The millions and millions of sperm need to be deposited in a potentially hostile environment, cover a relatively … Read More
How to support your partner through IVF
How to support your partner through IVF Coping with fertility challenges together – Some info and tips to help you support your partner through IVF. Always keep in mind that no one causes this on purpose. With such a high number of people working through infertility, you’re not journeying this alone. This article is written with both men and women … Read More
7 ways to improve male fertility
Male Fertility. 7 ways to safeguard your seeds. You may have heard the terms ‘low sperm count’ ‘poor motility’ ‘poor morphology’ being mentioned. You may have only heard your head sprouting out some not so nice thoughts. Terms related to ‘firing blanks’ was used as an insult to men at one point. I certainly hope it isn’t any more, and … Read More
Unravelling assisted conception options
IVF, ICSI, ED, TTC, 2WW… could go on forever with acronyms. If you are new to looking at choices regarding infertility then it may be rather daunting right now. If you’ve been here a while, you probably know as much as me, plus much more. Much more relevant to your individual journey. Sometimes we still need a little help unravelling … Read More
Fear releasing “what ifs….” etc.
The yearning for a baby is such a strong thing, and the fear of it never working out can be huge. I want to refer you to the ebook that I created called The Little Book of Hope here, because I want you to keep the hope alive. Recently I was talking of doom and gloom about a political issue … Read More
Surrogacy
Surrogacy: The art form and the miracle of growing a baby in another woman’s womb. I’ll clear up a bit of the terminology first of all. Types of surrogacy include straight surrogacy and host surrogacy. Host is when you use a embryo that has a different woman’s egg, not the egg of the surrogate mother. The egg can be that … Read More
Relaxing stress responses throughout IVF
Relaxing stress responses throughout IVF. IVF can be a long drawn out and potentially stressful time. Endless appointments, hospital car parks, clinic waiting rooms, injections and timescales, and a body going through a synthetic hormonal rollercoaster. Using a self hypnosis and EFT program to help you keep calm, emotionally and physically, through the journey will no doubt have an effect … Read More
Ways to keep calm in pregnancy
You can never have enough support. And there’s a wealth of it out there. Netmums, Facebook groups, NCT classes, friends, I could go on… My most favourite support group in recent times is the Positive Birth Movement. A non-judgmental grassroots movement. The group aim is to enable free to access to support. An organisation aiming for all women to have … Read More
Overcoming blockages whilst deciding how to deal with fertility issues
Overcoming blockages whilst deciding how to deal with fertility issues. It can feel like such an overwhelming time when deciding what to do. Heart and head may have different thoughts. Too many pros and cons in all different directions. The impacts of decisions can feel too heavy to even think about. Your potential choices are obviously going to depend on … Read More
Happy womb, happy woman.
Happy womb, happy woman. How to have a happy womb? Have you ever talked to your womb? Think I’m bonkers for asking. No problem!! But have you?! How I think you have a happier womb: I suggest doing some womb meditations and some hands-on healing for a happy and balanced womb, and there are some incredible clean and accessible foods … Read More
Hormones get a bad rap… unfairly.
Hormones get such a bad rap. Unfairly, I may add. I tend to think of hormones as the musical notes that create a song to dance to. When they are in balance, the dance is beautiful, but when they are all over the place, at best it becomes comical, and at worst it’s just not funny, downright irritable, and a … Read More
Why I really want to hold your baby
Why I really want to hold your baby. I’m quite an expert you know. Four babies of my own, one surrogate baby successfully created and delivered safely for her awaiting parents. Maybe we will manage to create another. Who knows. I don’t want any more babies. But I so want to hold yours. And yet Continue reading »
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Pregnancy care
Even if you don’t plan a birth to whale music, it doesn’t mean that hypnosis isn’t for you. Hypnotherapy and EFT can help you manage fears and feelings. Letting go of fears, that frequently aren’t even your own, they were Great Auntie Joyce’s fear that has been passed on through fear based stories, even though they meant well. Loads of … Read More
Delayed cord clamping (or OCC) as the healthy norm
Delayed cord clamping (or Optimal Cord Clamping – OCC) as the healthy norm. If someone told you that something that you can do to your precious tiny newborn could take away a third of his or her crucial blood supply, you wouldn’t do it, would you? If someone also told you that a routine procedure, with no known benefit, was … Read More
Childbirth Without Fear
All too often I hear stories from mothers old and new about how traumatic and difficult giving birth is… so even though I can empathise, I feel frustrated and saddened at why so many women are repeatedly experiencing these difficult and horrid births. Then, just the other day, I heard a fascinating story/viewpoint from a […]
The mayonnaise jar and the coffee
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the coffee… A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty […]
9 Tips for Long-Haul Flights with small children
“You’re brave” is all that I heard for a month before embarking on my travels exploring Australia with my four children. The eldest being 6, a tantrum filled 3 year old & 10 month-old twins. Most people get their travelling out of their system before they have children and then settle down and enjoy ‘less […]